Hello friends! I wrote this about a month ago and things have changed a lot again since then but I didn't post this at the time and as it's part of our journey I am going to post it now.
I am so sorry I haven't written for so long. Please do click on the youtube link to bring you up to date. If you do all will become clear as to why I have been quiet for so long! https://youtu.be/M2iLz1_WhaQ
For this entry I am going to write about where we are now as appose to what got us here because I'm not sure how long I will be able to keep this up for! I have a cannula right in the bend of my elbow which I have to try to keep straight because my veins are terrible at the moment, we had to try in my right arm and feet today (the cannula in my left arm blew over night so I've got a fabulous bruise!) before we had to settle on the crook of the elbow in my right arm, I am going to be hooked up to some more fluids tomorrow so if I can keep the vein from blowing by not bending my arm too much that's just what I have to do!
Today was the first day that I got to wake up at home, go into hospital to be hydrated and come home again. It was so much better then staying in over night. I know when I have the op I have no choice about coming home at night and I want to keep my hospital stays to an absolute minimum in the lead up to the surgery. I didn't really have a choice Thursday night and poor Amelia-Rose cried herself to sleep which of course had me in tears when I found out!
I will fully admit the getting there and getting back is horrendous, we don't have a wheelchair upstairs because mine is too heavy and huge to get up the stairs safely but it means Tony is having to carry me from the top of the stairs to the bedroom and although he just picks me up fairly easily *considering I am the tallest* but things like that are those silly things that get to me because he isn't lifting me because we are messing around he is doing it because he HAS to and that suddenly makes me feel a bit erm, at a loss with my dignity.
I would say to my fellow sufferer "Dignity is never taken away from you when someone is acting out of love" and yet I am human and therefore do not always practise what I preach when my own securities and self doubts whisper in my ear. I'm working on it. At least I am aware that it happens and can acknowledge it is something I need to work on.
This is as far as I got with this post but like I say I think it's important to post these drafts because it's all part of our journey.
